Sunday, November 8, 2009

word vomit

it's 1:15 a.m.! I can't function after 10 p.m.
take that as you will.

i'm going to restrain from editing this or taking it off all together because it is a rant, and rants are supposed to be whimsical, immature, and filled with many different kinds of errors...ok, well most of mine are. and what i'm about to chew the unknown-nobody-who-reads-this-blog out about, i think, is the essence of who i am and an important thing that really does dwell deep and just hurts sometimes.

It really is no surprise to some about just how much i hate it. especially LSU.
We can go to church and talk about seeing everyone as God's children and cheer and clap and support people that start programs like "lightfield" and go and feed the hungry every other sunday morning, or whenever the time is because they're "God's people too" and then turn and be this ridiculous about a damn game. did i watch it? nope. didn't have to. the facebook and twitter updates were enough to make my queasy.

i am not a judgmental person when it comes to fundamentalism and rules and what is acceptable 'Christian behavior'. i mean did you miss it?? i just said, "damn." right there! third paragraph (above this one), third sentence. or close to it...(dang, run-ons.)
this is not about you looking a little different outside of church. this isn't anything about being in the world and not of it. different topic. different middle of the night rant.

this is about PEOPLE! loving people. every week I get upset, and every week i think...sooner or later these people will get it. and every week the updates and statuses get nastier and nastier and a whole lot more personal.

ahh it makes me sick! opposing fans, players, whoever the hell jarret lee is... i'm sure he's a son. or at least was one at one time. a son who is busting his ass in front of the whole nation and has 42 billion facebook/twitter statuses about how bad he sucks. And refs who have to hear about one mistake that could ruin their reputation forever. ONE MISTAKE. heck, 2 mistakes. 3,4,5. I make 10 terrible mistakes every 2 minutes. type a status about me. my dad has been a referee for numerous sports. my dad is the most fair human being i've ever met in my entire life and someone who i think can never tackle something and not do it well. he's told me stories. he's told me that from the only angle he was standing, he could see what he thought was the player's foot slide across home when the opposing coach was screaming that he didn't touch it and then having 50+ people go home after a disappointing loss blaming only my dad for their defeat. CARRY THAT AROUND FOR A WHILE!

come on, people. apparently there's this special guy in my social work class that is big stuff. his name is jordan jefferson (i think?) and i found out the specialness behind that name about 2 weeks ago (only about a month left in the class). i sometimes see him and just picture walking around campus after a big game that he might not have done his best at. EVERYONE knows. everyone has talked about it. everyone has given their two sense in on the one mistake you made and dwelling on what could have happened or what should have happened...not taking into account how hard he has worked to get to that point and how hard he is trying. ew... i just can't imagine. i squirm thinking about being in his shoes. well he can rest assure that there's at least one dark headed girl in his social work class that wouldn't even know, much less give a crap, about what he did on saturday night.

don't worry. you can get your very own at

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