Monday, April 19, 2010

healing is in Your hands.

I Got Baptized.
Sunday Night.

There was SO much anticipation leading up to that night.
And if you KNOW me, you know what I'm talking about. ;)
I kept forgetting how important baptisms are.
Just because my transformation happened a long time ago, didn't make Sunday night any less significant. I was just proclaiming it and identifying with the Lord.

And it was amazing.
So many people showed up.
My family. Parents, Granny, Papaw, aunts, uncles, cousins, sister, nieces.
My Aunt Nancy who surprised me and drove all the way from Atlanta.
Luke's Family. My friends from all seasons of my life.
Even Todd came. He showed me how to live like Jesus in high school.
My niece who had to drive all the way to New Orleans for a paper and a test on Monday morning came.

I can't put into words how my heart felt just to have them all there and to experience my family, the church one. I cry when I think about it.

Then I got to sit in the front row (on the left side ;) ) and worship with sweet little girls from my community group who were also taking that step with me. I even got a precious hug during prayer time from a certain little blondie who was ecstatic about her time to get dunked.

Church was packed. And my Ring family took in my blood family without a blink of an eye.
And that feels good.

My heart was (and still is) just so...full.
I can't explain it.
So I'm not going to try to.

I went last so I got to sit and listen to every single story. 8 of them to be exact. And got to pray with every one of them. I'm so grateful I got to go last.

And then it was my turn.
I had to talk.
I wasn't nervous about my words. I usually know what He wants me to say.
And I usually say it.
Sometimes I don't, but last night...I did.
And I'm glad I did.

And then prayers were prayed over me.
One in particular was voiced by a special friend in my life.
I can't bring words to how grateful and honored I am for the words said and the friendship behind them.
That was my favorite part.

Leading up to the whole night my biggest prayer was that my family and friends wouldn't come for me, but for Him. I know the Lord would go before me so I wasn't nervous. But I sure did pray hard for something to happen.
There was such a huge mixture of important people in my life there last night.
Ones hurting.
Some broken.
Others searching for churches that won't hurt.
Ones craving restoration of some form in their life.
Some just wanting to experience my church and learn what all it's about.
Some even in the middle of some of the darkest times in their lives at this very moment and a baptism service was the last place they wanted to be.
But...they were there.

I keep praying that they would get stirred up. A prayer, a song, a testimony, a joke, something, to stick with them.
And I pray that the Spirit works on them long after they walked out of those doors last night.

But if there is one thing I did learn last night, it's that (like the song) Healing is in His Hands.

Listening to all of those stories from every person before they were dunked made me realize again just how much I love the Lord's creativity and uniqueness to each and every one of us. I've fallen in love with that truth before, but last night I fell deeper.
If you know me, you know I am so strong in believing that the Lord is more than just a church service and a few songs. I believe that with everything that I am. But sometimes, I forget.

I found myself putting faith in last night's service, and not in the Lord.
"If only I can get them here. If only they can experience church the way I know it. They will change. It will change them just like it changed me."

And you know what heals people? Jesus. Can Jesus use a church service, a sermon, a song, a prayer, a baptism to change lives? Yes. But those things alone can't do it. Those aren't the answer. He is.

All night I sat in bed and prayed and cried and just hoped that healing would come to the ones who needed it, clinging onto the hope that a life would change, a heart would open, or a wound would begin to mend.

But it wasn't until late in the night that the song came to mind. And His voice sang loud through it.

Healing is in His hands.

Did you catch it?
HIS Hands.
His will. His time. His story. His creativity. His work. His love. His way.

Not my hands. Not on my time. Not even in my understanding. But in His hands, healing will come. No baptism service alone will ever be enough. No story, no sermon, no song.
But only through His hands and His time will healing come.

So I'll sleep at peace tonight.
With a heart full.
And a love deeper and stronger than before Sunday night.

(google readers,pop out if you wanna play the song)

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